Contraception closes the heart to child welcome; the natural approaches favour the development of an open attitude toward life

I am Marie Sentis. In 1981, I went to Rome to participate in a training session with the Australian Drs Billings in the presence of several Roman Cardinals including Mgr Angelini and Mgr Trujillo. Here, I met René and Isabelle Ecochard… We were all impressed by the Billings approach: at the same time scientific (a lot of physiology), humanistic (natural birth control concerns everybody, whatever their race or religion), and Christian (doctrinal teaching and spiritual food, with daily Mass!). We returned back to France with the intention to better share the Billings method.

I had met my husband in a think-tank about the Social Doctrine of the Church and the encyclicals, of whom Humanae Vitae. In 1975, the Veil law has just been adopted... and Humanae Vitae was then much debated.

The promotion of the Billings method came then naturally!

We were viscerally convinced of the intrinsic link between contraception and abortion.

By that time, being "pro-life" was considered as a systematic and aggressive opposition, an anti-abortion position. Indeed, we were sharing this position but in a positive way; I was glad to offer a way open to life.

Here, I may say that the first option has always been to put forward, at the beginning of the method presentation, since the first slides, the possibility of a surprise child: "What would you do if, because of failing to follow the rules, a baby arrives?"

This led to a presentation of the whole embryonic development up to birth in order to show the importance of life. This is still a priority for the Billings Method Centre in France! This seems very simple but, at the beginning, was not a systematic choice.

After 30 years as trainers and promoters of the method (through Associations Familiales Catholiques or media such as Santé Magazine), we went logically, my husband and I, from teaching and promoting natural birth control to close contacts with women who have had an imminent abortion project.

In 2008, we created Igv.NET, an Internet site intended to women who plan to abort and who face technical and psychological questions. Often, the questions are direct, such as "Where may I get abortion?" but there are also a lot of anxiety face to an unnatural act.

Still, these women are in an abortion project. They feel injured by love via their mothers, their partners, or their boyfriends.

We were as in an "observatory" of life welcome in France. As a telephone counsellor, I answered, since 2008, nearly 3.600 calls. This number is currently circa 20 daily calls answered by nearly 20 counsellors.

Here, I should say that the most difficult interviews take usually place with more or less practicing young Catholics who want to abort.

Paradoxically, we notice that immigrant women (from North Africa or elsewhere), who were very numerous to call, are more open to life than women of French descent.

For us, Christians, preventing abortion is an emergency because it is a part of our duty of teaching the truth and proclaiming the Gospel of life!

Anyone who is present here may face abortion.

Your interlocutors may face the problem whatever their age. The seniors are often parents or grand-parents of a daughter or a granddaughter who may want to abort for several reasons.

We should strongly believe that:

Contraception is not the cure for abortion! (Cf. Evangelium vitae, § 13)

In my personal experience, I can tell that more that 9 women out of 10 who call us in the context of an abortion project take contraceptives. Their logic is the following: "Contraception is a right, I do not want to have a baby, so, if, despite contraception I have a baby, this is an accident and the fault is that of my doctor and of his pills. I should thus benefit from a way to correct this medical error and get rid of that pregnancy!" (They never say "get rid of the baby").

Thus, isn't contraception the mean of avoiding abortion? No, this is absolutely wrong. Contraception paves the way for abortion, even worse, it trivialises it.

On this, one should read and consider the prophetic aspect of Encyclical Evangelium vitae that presents contraception and abortion as two fruits of the same tree.

Confidence

I was once stunned to hear a priest saying: "I cannot talk about abortion; I am afraid of hurting the women who had aborted."

You must think of the women and of the young people around you! They need these words. Even grandmothers may influence granddaughters when necessary.

Thus, truly, it is sad to hear some women, practicing Catholics, say: "The mercy of God is here; God will forgive me!"

I still have several examples of the same kind…

I believe we should wring the neck to a very frequent position that consists of talking about God's mercy before abortion and practice some psychology after it to repair the damages in the person who committed the act. It is the contrary that should be done!

Before abortion, all possible resources should be used and all arguments should be presented to display the horror of abortion:

· Try an approach through religion and use the argument of authority

· Talk about Hope (the theological virtue) with which the Christian should face to various kinds of difficulties

· Use medical and psychological arguments (dangers of abortion, risk of depression, etc.)

However, one should be firm on the severity of the act. Most women who call us seek for a help to abort, search for justifications, want to be consolidated in their choice while knowing exactly in their deep conscience what they are going to do. We are firm. We never excuse abortion.

Even face to dramatic situations, we let shine the light of hope. We have faced cases of rape in girls 18 or even 16 years old, though, after our interventions, several have carried their pregnancies to term. This was the case of Océane, 14 years from Mantes-la-Jolie.

Another example: Aurore was about to abort in the Netherlands. I was very firm and the association gave her 1000 Euros. Here is the message I received from her recently:

"Hi Marie, I sent you this E-mail to thank you from the bottom of my heart for what you have done to me because I didn't expect this gesture. Sincerely, thank you on behalf of my children and myself. I also want to tell you that I had some problems with the father of my children... He returned from travel and managed to cut the phone line and threw us out. I found a mobile that keeps me in touch but I cannot call. Please, call me, but not with a masked phone number because, fearing it would be him, I would not answer. Thank you! Thank you! Thank you a thousand times for everything you did. It is incredible to see that persons like you still exist in our world... Best regards."

Nadia: Three abortions, heroin consumer, three children, imprisoned partner.

You too, may have to play the same role.

Alas, when pregnancy termination had taken place, we are all somewhat helpless.

We, CATHOLICS, are essential links, after termination of pregnancy, to show these women the mercy of God. Then why not tell them about the Sacrament of Reconciliation, a necessary way for spiritual healing?

On this, I would like to remind you that it is very difficult to "heal" humans. There will always be a deep wound. "God forgives always, humans forgive sometimes, but nature never forgives" used to say Pr Lejeune.

This is why the approach should be up to the challenge. The confidences I heard have shown that a simple confession is not sufficient. A real repair approach should be undertaken.

Conclusion:

With contraception, the link between sex and the child is cut... The meaning of human sex is denied; sex is dedicated to the gift of life. Marriage, within which human sex is especially expressed, is dedicated to this purpose. Today, this space of communion and alterity is denied by school curricula (even private schools) and the norm has become to actively diffuse contraception among young people past 15 years of age! Thus, let us be clear! Should we remain silent? Should we comply with this pagan world?

We should condemn what the Catholics find it hard to see and recognize as a sin!

However, we carry a big hope... the one that is given to us by the Gospel of life. Pope Francis has dedicated a Mass to commemorate the Gospel of life. He said:

"The Christian is not a spiritual human; he doesn't live in the clouds, out of reality (as if it was a fantasy). No! The Christian is a person who thinks and acts in everyday life according to God's will..."

Let's say 'yes' to life, not to death! Let's say 'yes' to liberty, not to slavery or to the many idols of our time. Let's ask Mary, the Mother of Life, to help us welcome and always preach the "Gospel of Life". So be it!